Monday, November 7, 2011

We are learning to make fire...


Write On Wednesdays Exercise 23 - Write the words of Margaret Atwood at the top of your page "We are learning to make fire". Set your timer to 5 minutes. Write the first words that come into your head after the prompt. Stop when the buzzer rings.

This is the first writing exercise I have done in a long time where I used pen and paper. I am a child of my generation - an extension of my laptop. But handwriting suits me. The words flowed generously. Even better is that I can pick up my little notebook and pen and do an exercise like this any time, while my little girl scampers around me. Liberty.



We are learning to make fire.

Tate leaned out from the caravan. "What the hell are you doing, Jimbo? That's not a fire."
I shrugged. Liz smirked.
"Fuck off, man. I'm trying," I said.
The sticks made a soggy pile, collapsing in and suffocating each other. I kicked the pathetic pile and Liz laughed.
"Don't worry about it," she whispered. "He's the expert in these things." She leant into me.
I'd been in WA two weeks now, staying with my mate Tate and his girlfriend Liz. Their lives were so simple, so uncomplicated. No bills, no assignments, just surf, sun and each other.
The unfortunate pile of sticks seemed to mock me, as they lay strewn where there should have been a fire.

9 comments:

  1. I love what this says about Aussie guys , the way they relate and their friendships (I read the narrator as a bloke, was I right?)
    Nice!
    Kate

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  2. The last line is perfect. It says so much with just a few words. Great job!

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  3. Nice write. I agree with Stephanie, the last line rocks!

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  4. I liked the dialogue, especially the f*ck off.....its exactly what I would have said in the same circumstances :) this piece feels very real.

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  5. I really loved the dialogue, very nature and funny - funny is always good! I think Liz might have a soft spot for Jimbo... Wonder if he'll stay put in WA?

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  6. Great dialogue. I'm terrible at writing convincing, natural dialogue, so I admire those who can do it, and you can definitely do it. It tells us things the narrative doesn't, and that's a great thing!

    Ah, to live an uncomplicated life without assignments...

    / Rain

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  7. Very natural - a really believable piece. I think Liz may have a soft spot for him too ;)

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  8. I really liked the easy way this piece flowed. I'm with the others, the last line is perfect :)

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  9. Zanni, pen and paper work well for you! Love the tone, feel and natural quality to this little piece. I'd love to read more, it had a Tim Winton feel to it...the WA landscape and relationships within it. Cool piece!

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